Tuesday, March 3, 2009

My Son and His Tapeworm

Boo is making up for lost time.
Three days of no food thanks to the roto bug have resulted in a child who eats both siblings and me under the table.
The Man is still the king of the table, but not by much. Even he has to guard his plate and eat quickly before boo hoovers it up.
When we first took him in, Boo weighed 29 1/2 pounds Two days later, he weighed 28 1/2. He's now packing it on and in.
Bug will finish what he wants of dinner, and Boo will surreptitiously pull his brother's plate over and start grazing.
Punk doesn't watch her tray, Boo reaches over and helps himself.
And he's very grateful for meals, telling me, "Thanks you for a good dinner, mommy," several times each meal.
I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder. Or at least the stomach.
The Man and I think he's got a tapeworm he's feeding, because we don't know where he's putting it all. His name is Wormy, per Boo.
He's only three feet tall, for Pete's sake!
We're beginning to wonder about the grocery bill in a few years, because we already spend a small fortune keeping these kids fed.
Bologna isn't cheap , you know. It doesn't grow on trees, although some parts of it might have lived in trees at some time.
Two boys as teenagers. I won't get a bite of food, which would be great for my diet and bad for everything else.
The Man worries about reaching for the last bite of anything, afraid he might lose more fingers. (Yep, we only said it happened at work. Now you know the real story!)
Guess I should just reconcile myself to licking the crumbs off their chairs and slurping the plates clean.
If my kids don't beat me to it.

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