Monday, March 31, 2008

Two years ago today

Two years ago today, still recovering from having my insides on the outside of my body, I looked into my youngest son's face for the first time.
My first thought was, "He looks like Buddha."
My second was, "And I love him more than life itself."
Strange what a good dose of drugs will do for you.
Buddha eventually just became Boo, my blue eyed charmer with his mama's temper and his daddy's mild nature--a unique combo. Its kind of like trying to decide if wet dynamite might still be explosive.
Bug is my miracle and my heart's wish. Boo is my resurrection and my love. Punk is my dearest and my baby.
Boo gave me a gift none of my other children can ever give me. My labor with bug was so difficult and I suffered from issues with breastfeeding and depression, so Bug naturally turned to his father. By the time I could mother my baby, he and I had lost valuable time.
Boo wanted me from the start. He was mine in a way no other person ever had been. He made me feel like a mother at last.
Having Boo helped my relationship with Bug bloom at last.
Whereas Bug is my live wire, Boo is my clown. He greets me with a smile each morning and is genuinely a happy child. He has the most delectable chunky thighs an pudgy hands, and his laughter makes me stop and grin.
Bug made me a mother. Boo made me want to be a mom.
Happy birthday little man. I love you and would let you rip my inside out all over again.

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