Going Commando

I don't often get to pick Boo up from school, but I was lucky enough to be able to leave work to do just that one day.
I got greeted with a smile and a hug. Then told he's had an accident in his underwear.
No biggee. Shit happens. And we'd sent back up clothes.
Chatted with the teachers aide, gathered up my minions, and headed home.
Only to discover . . .
My son was going commando.
Flying free and easy.
In other words, he didn't have any underwear on.
Because it's just how I am, I immediately went to the bag, discovered that he only had the clean back up pair, and went from zero to livid.
After the Man stupidly tried to diffuse me (he's still recovering), I called the school.
And was told by the teacher what happened.
Boo and another boy went to the classrooms restrooms at the same time (not the same stall!) and when she walked by the sink later, there was a pair of underwear sitting by the sink.
The other boy was close, so she asked him.
And he said they were his.
And he'd pooped.
And he had changed himself because he didn't want to wear poopy underwear.
Boo was conspicuously absent.
They apologized. They also sent then home with the other parent, who I'm sure is as amazed as I am over this whole ordeal.
And she's stuck handling my kids shit.
Literally.