Lax

I've been lax lately.
I know it.
I've been told it.
Repeatedly.
I haven't had the time nor inclination to write anything because this time of year is harder for me than any other.
October was not only my fifteenth wedding anniversary, but the anniversary of my beloved grandpa's death and my miscarriage.
Congrats to me.
November is the anniversary of my daddy's passing, Thanksgiving, and his birthday, all within one rotten week that I endeavor to survive without running down some annoying pedestrian who can't grasp the concept of a Don't Walk sign.
December is my birthday (no biggee there--I ignore it), my husband's birthday (Gods He's getting old!), the holidays, and my daughter's birthday.
From October on, I am at a run and I don't stop dodging shrapnel and well wishes until the new year.
Add to that trying to close on a house, finishing work on the kids rooms, recovery from m wisdom teeth debaucle, a cold that just won't die no matter how many times I try to smother it in Lysol and Nyquil, shopping for my kids, trips to Santa, and field trips, holiday parties, etc. and I'm lucky I haven't collapsed into a whimpering heap.
I realize this is my life now, complete with childhood illnesses, sad reminders of lost loved ones, and an empty pocketbook, but I find myself wishing for the simplicity of childhood. The time when someone would bring me hot tea or soda to sip instead of waiting on me to bring it to them.
I never knew how good I had it until the heathens gave me some not so subtle reminders.
Such as:
My four year old crawling in bed with me and snoring so loudly I can't sleep because he's congested.
My hands smelling of Vick's because I am constantly slathering my kids chest with it.
Trips to see Santa and shelling out a month's mortgage for one 5x7 and four wallets pictures.
Racing to buy a bumble bee pillow pet because that is the only thing Boo wanted only to have him decide he wants a panda instead after I've purchased the stupid thing.
Arguing with The Man, who thinks any toys that don't explode, electrocute, leak, whistle, or honk are boring.
When I was a child, things just happened. Now I'm the one who makes them happen.
So I've been lax. I've been resisting the urge to slip into a coma and have people take care of me.
But knowing my family, I wouldn't get rest, even then.