Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Who is that strange man?

Some days, I look at The man and I just don't know.
I don't know who he is anymore.
I don't know what he's thinking.
I don't know what freaking planet he's from.
Those are the days I question the wisdom of marriage. Really. I know it was the idea of a woman, because no man would choose to be saddled with one woman and her growing saddlebags for life.
After his accident, there have been a lot of those days. The ones where I study the man like a strange zoo exhibit and ponder my own sanity. Most days, I find my mental faculties sadly lacking.
But there are also days when I look at him and catch a glimpse of the young man I married.
The man who is one of a handful of people that can make me laugh so hard I cry and pee at the same time--a rare skill indeed.
The one who chases our kids around the yard playing soccer until he hurts his knee and limps to me for the sympathy he knows he's not going to get. (When you are on your deathbed, then I will sympathize. If I do that every time you are sick, you'll just get sick/hurt/maimed more often for attention, you know!)
The man I couldn't imagine my life without almost fifteen years ago (and, yes, I know we've been married 14 years, but December will be 15 years since we met.)
Some days, I want to chunk it all, move to a small, poorly inhabited island, and never have to see him or the heathens again. Especially when his DNA is strongest in our children.
But most days, I realize I don't have much room to complain. (Not that I won't complain, I'll just have to be more creative in my endeavors.) We have little money, but a lot of love and laughter and three lovely children who eventually fall asleep and are blessedly silent.
I am married to a man who likes to do housework, so I don't have to. Who enjoys getting down and dirty with the kids, again so I don't have to. (I am the more cerebral parent.) Who does yard work, again, so I don't have to.
And even though he drives me berserk and makes me contemplate homicide, I realize that, if I did off him, I'd have to do all of those things I don't like to do.
And my mama didn't raise a fool.

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